RED HAWK TIMES

News from Home

Volume 1 Issue 4 October 4, 1987
CONTENTS
Public Service Announcement by Mary Cars in the News
Daily News...Weekly News by Nick Peterka's Main Bathroom: War Zone
Red Hawk Rambling by David Soccer Game
Flash Brunswick Ups Record to 5-0
Walker Cottage Girls at Peterka's Bogglemania
Eyewitness Peterka News Team Report Advice From Dear Ann
Doggone Funny by Brian

Public Service Announcement by Mary

Bogglemania has hit the Peterka household. Boggle is being played at all hours of the afternoon with an occasional break for an airplane throwing contest. As part of this public service announcement we are going to list some of the words which they forgot to put in the dictionary. They include: til, toc, toady, def, gotc, det, tel, tix, goid, tic, lege, tac, and nad. Most of these words we have been assured are obscure scientific terms. We hope the people responsible will correct their oversight.

Daily News...Weekly News by Nick

Today in the news Stripe the hamster died and we have no idea how it happened. Also, Brian Peterka went to Gil's house on Saturday and as you probably know Mom and Dad Peterka forgot to pick him up. Brian has forgiven them.

I'm Nick Peterka and that's all the news for today.

Red Hawk Rambling by David

This week in the news the Peterka family was in mourning because of the loss of Stripe Peterka. Because everyone was so sad, Mary Peterka slipped an extra bottle of wine in the pizza sauce. After we all ate the pizza we started a game of Boggle. In the middle of the game Mary Peterka stood up and screamed "AIRPLANE CONTEST!"

We all immediately stood up, made our airplanes and ran into the bathroom. One by one we threw our airplanes down the hallway. By the time the last one was thrown Tweed Peterka was up and destroying all of the planes. She grabbed David's plane and ran downstairs. In the basement she saw Alan and his friends playing Doctor Ruth's Game of Good Sex!!!!! Tweed thought to herself for a minute and decided that they were to young to be playing it. She immediately picked up the game, ran upstairs and hid the game board. Which proves my point, you can't play boggle when you have no eyes.

Flash

Mom Peterka baked 3 pies! Two apple! One Cherry! All Peterkas very happy!!!

Eyewitness Peterka News Team Report

Hi, I'm Alan and you're Kevin and we're the EYEWITNESS PETERKA NEWS TEAM. I'm writing to tell you that there isn't much happening with the musical news except that Bryon and Greg got leads. It will probably stink. I've no opinions yet because I really don't know the leading girl and I don't know what I'm supposed to do. Are you really reading this??? Anyway, I hope to have more news next paper so to repeat myself: watch for the next Red Hawk Times. I'm Alan and you're Kevin. Have a safe supper! Good-bye!!!

Advice From Dear Ann

Dear Ann, Nothing exciting ever happens here. What do you suggest we do?
--Bored

Dear Bored,
Offer to help your parents!!!

Dear Ann, How do I keep from flying my paper airplanes into the wall?
-Ex-pilot

Dear ex-pilot,
Have someone else make them and fly them. Also get yourself a new Job.

Dear Ann, How can I make my Mom get me a trombone?
-not Nick

Dear "not" Nick,
All you have to do is start to sing or play another instrument. She will realize that you are so bad at singing or another instrument, she will get you a trom-bone. Nagging is good too.

Cars in the News

The Fiesta got new tires this week!!!!! The Station Wagon got a $3 fuse which fixed the turn signals and a new pair of windshield wipers. The Van also got windshield wipers. But the big news is the Van's brakes and tailpipe all need to be fixed. The Van will be at the garage for a day or two. During that time Claudia Peterka will be driving the Station Wagon. Vern Peterka will be driving his new tires back to Sunbury PA. on Monday morning!!!

Peterka's Main Bathroom: War Zone

Vern Peterka began Tuesday evening to tear out the wall surrounding the tub in the main bathroom. All the tile was taken out. The dry wall was all pulled off of the 2 x 4. Two huge garbage cans were full with tiles. It took Mr. Peterka the entire week to finish ripping out the walls. Now he leaves for a week in Sunbury PA and the wooden 2 x4 get to continue to dry out. He ready purchased the new water resistant drywall and the new tub and shower fixtures. Still need a few more pipes and the bath enclosure unit. The project is moving along nicely and should be done within a month. Then he will begin on the shower in his bathroom.

Soccer Game

Eagles would have played the Panthers on 10-3-87 if the fields were not so crummy to play on.

If they did play, I'm sure the Eagles would have won: 7-0. Ann Peterka would have scored 5 points during the game. One point would have been scored by Kirsten Olsen and the other by someone on the other team.

I'm positive the Red Hawks sports staff would have voted Ann Peterka player of the week once again!

Brunswick Ups Record to 5-0

Brunswick played at North Royalton Fri-day night. Although no one on the Red Hawks sports staff could make the game, we hear it was a very exciting game. Tom Dubs threw for 185 yards and ran for one touchdown. The final score of the game was Brunswick 27, North Royalton 7.

*****PHONEY BROWNS TEAM BEATS PHONEY NEW ENGLAND TEAM: 20-10!!! STRIKE MAY BE OVER ON MONDAY!!! RUMORS FLY!!!*****

Walker Cottage Girls at Peterka's

On Thursday evening three of the Walker Cottage girls came over to the Peterka home. They came so that Vern Peterka could take their pictures. Included with the group were Trina, Mary and Nikki. All posed very well. Vern Peterka also took a picture of Claudia Peterka to send to their son, Kevin. After the pictures were taken the girls watched the 20th anniversary film. They all liked the film. Mary will be leaving the cottage by October 9, 1987. There will be a party for her on Thursday after school.

Bogglemania...

1.   N  I  T  Y
     H  G  M  M
     Y  D  I  E
     A  G  O  S

2.   W  A  G  E
     M  R  Qu T
     A  D  I  E
     Y  L  P  R

3.   R  G  D  C
     R  I  U  D
     F  O  E  T
     I  T  V  O

4.   X  R  T  M
     H  K  Z  S
     Y  G  R  M
     T  H  D  N

Doggone Funny by Brian

This is sent to us from Jason in Malibu, California. He says that his dog can sit up and talk. Of course we didn't believe it because everyone knows that dogs can't sit up and talk at the same times So he took us to court where we met Judge Wapner. The verdict turned out that the dog couldn't do either, he could only roll over. Now isn't that special?


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