Funny, jokes, unprepared, silly, Mrs. Sprowls, nerves, limp arm, freshman, chemistry, singing, loud,. Mrs. Thrash, some guys, many girls, Amy K, Bryon T., Ann and Al Peterka, Greg Wentz (?), no real baritone parts: these are just a few words describing the try-outs for the musical GUYS AND DOLLS. Both Ann and I did very good. Mrs. Sprowls called me to read about four times, and on one of these times I had to read a sentence like "I don't see how you could be so calm about all this!" But, instead of saying "calm" I said, "clam" it was a bit embarrassing. Ann had trouble say-ing "rhododendron", but so did all the other girls that had to say it.
The singing Try-outs were held a lot differently than Mr. Bianci did them, but still very easy. Everyone sang in pairs. I sang with Bryon. He drowned me out on the first song, but after that I sang louder and told him to tone it down a bit. I don't really know how any girls did except everyone I talked to said Ann did good.
Call-backs were only needed for the girls. Amy K., Alice Nagel, Gina Bruno were a few girls that were called back. As far as I know call backs went fairly good too.
Keep watching for next weeks RED HAWK TIMES which should have the results of the GUYS AND DOLLS try-outs. (Lets hope we don't mention Greg W. as the lead!!!!!)
Crime Report by Mary
This past week two serious offenses were committed. The First occurred Fri-day night when Brian E. Peterka asked a friend could stay over night. (No, you assume wrong. The friend was not Miss Kelly Puker.) The second occurred Saturday morning when David M. Peterka put the wet clothes, which were in the washing machine, into the dryer. The writers of this paper realize that many will find it shocking that such under-handed and devious activities have been occurring in what had been previously assumed to be a normal home. Both offen-ders were sentenced to a severe scolding. and we are assured they will never com-mit these crimes again.
Dear Ann, I am in love with a girl in my clarinet class. How do I
know if she re-turns my regard?
-Hopeful
Hopeful,
If she is in love with you, she will throw-up on you.
Dear Ann, Do you have any suggestions to liven up a dull weekend?
-Bored
Bored,
No.
Dear Ann, My mom yells at me constantly for helping her. What
should I do?
-D. Confused
D. Confused,
Let her yell. Everyone needs to get their frustrations out on
something. Your mom just happens to take them out on you for trying
to help. You have two choices. You can either take the yellings like
a man/woman or not help her anymore. I recommend the second choice.
Dear Ann, There's a certain family that expects me to visit them
every week but all I really want are their video tapes. What can I do?
-Bored but Greedy
Bored but Greedy,
Stop being such a pig and buy your own tapes!!!
Dear Editor: Your crime reporter is biased. She has not included
any of the facts. Facts such as (1) being tricked by Brian into
agreeing to let Gil come for an overnight and when Gil couldn't come
then hounding me to let Luke come instead; (2) Gil came the following
afternoon. Facts concerning the wet clothes incident are:
(1) 1 got up early to wash and hang my clothing outdoors as it was a
beautiful day.(2) After doing 3 loads, I left to wash the Van and
return Coke bottles. Only Nick came along. (3) As I was leaving I
told Brian to clean the kit-chen. He forgot to do this. (4) David put
my blouses which I particularly wanted to hang outside into the dryer
and turned dial to the longest drying time! (5) All of my blouses were
wrinkled. So I lost my temper. Twice! Both times were justified. In
the future have your reporters report all the facts.
--Harassed Mom
This week in the news Daddy Peterka went to Sunbury PA. Now lets interview him!
Q: What was your favorite meal?
A: It was a filet mignon at 11055's place.
Q: Why are we doing this stupid article?
A: Because the Editor is making us.
Q: What job were you doing there?
A: I was trying to make the scrubber work.
Q: Why did you come home with so many gloves?
A: Because I found them in the garbage so I picked up all 12 pairs and
brought them home and washed them all up. I'll never need to buy work
gloves again.
Q: Were you having an affair there?
A: He denied it totally, but I think he's lying.
Dad Peterka got home at 2 P.M. - just in time for Ann's soccer game. That wraps it up in the news this week. I'm Brian, and I'm Nick and we hope you have a safe summer. Good bye everyone.
Red Hawk Rambling by David
This week in the news Mary Frances Peterka was tempted to go out and get drunk with her friends. They wanted her to take a fake Identification. Just as her friends suggested it, a little angel appeared on her right shoulder.
"Mary, my child, you don't want to do this", said the angel.
Just then a tiny little devil appear-ed on her left shoulder. "Don't listen to that sap, Mary. She just wants to make a wimp out of you." the little devil said with evilness in his voice.
Right then the devil jumped over Mary's head and attacked the angel. Fists were flying everywhere until Mary saw a cute guy pass the door, She immediately left the two fighting and went to meet him. He turned out to be another jerk so she went home without a drink. Which proves my point, you should never wear brown shoes with a blue hat.
The Revelation Minute by Dr. E. Berken, Amateur Theologian
When the fourth angel sounds his trum-pet it is said that there will be a great earthquake. In addition to this, the sun and moon are to be blotted out. This will probably happen in the next few weeks so watch your diet and don't bother meeting anyone new.
Brunswick Defeats Berea by A.M.
The most important game and Brunswick somehow manages to win by a score of 7-3! Berea almost won! It was the last minute of the game and Berea had managed to get to Brunswick's 30 yard line. It was first and ten to go when a flag flew - off sides- 10 yards back. Still first but now 20 yards to go. Hike! Fumble! Brunswick has recovered the ball and also won the game!
Now I am being forced - with a machine gun to my head - to tell who sat with Ann and Alan Peterka. Bryon T., Alisha S., Brian-Alisha S cousin, Amy K., Chris M., Tom C., Lori L., and Tracy C.. After the game A.P., A.P., B.T., A.S., A.K., and T.C. went out for pizza at the HUT!!!!!
FLASH.. .FLASH. . .FLASH. . .FLASH. . .FLASH...
NO FOOTBALL. BROWNS STRIKE!!
Eagles Victorious by A.M.
The Cobras (1-2-1) tried really hard but still could not defeat the Eagles (4-0). The eagles won 3-2! The Eagles dominated the first half scoring all of their goals. The goals were made by Theresa Kulbaga and Becky Kulbaga - 2. One of these goals was assisted by the amazing Ann Peterka. In the second half the Cobras scored twice to finish the scoring. (Editor’s note: the Cobras had four more players on their team. They also were using three players to defend against Ann Peterka!)
The Red Hawk Times sports staff have voted Ann Peterka most valuable player. Even though she made no goals, her presence greatly helped the team.
Next week the Eagles will once again play the Panthers and probably up their record to 5-0!!!
Crosswords...Word Search...Puzzles by Brian
Fill in each triangle with the numbers: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 Use each number only once.
Total numbers in both rows given.
Answers to last week's puzzle: Peterka, cat, dog, hamster, school, television, cleaning, coke, New York, Brunswick.