Brunswick Vandalists by Alan
It was Friday morning somewhere between
12 A.M. - 4:00 A.M. that the vandalists
struck the Peterka yard. Alan
Peterka (16) and Ann Marie Peterka (14)
were the first to find the yard wrapped
up like a mummy. Alan said while looking
at the mess drapping from tree to tree,
"I hope it wasn't any of my friends!" Ann
stated while unwrapping the van, "This
1ooks cool!" The expert clean-up committee:
David, 13, Brian, 11 and Nick 8 said
"This was one great rolling job, so we
ought to get Clevengers back!" Little did
they Know, it wasn't Clevengers. As Alan
and Ann got to school, Al picked up some
additional information. It turned out
Peterka's weren't the only ones vandalized.
Amy Kolinski, Bryon Thomas, Alicia S.,
Traci Christler, and Tabatha Saraniti were
also rolled. With this additional info
it was easy to suspect three persons as
the vandalists. They are Doug S., Jess
and Steve D. --none of whom admitted to
the rolling. When Alan and Ann returned
home all the "t.p." was out of the trees
(well mostly)'. Later that evening Mary
Peterka, 19 said, "That's a terrible
thing to do, I think we should sue them
for trespassing!" upon hearing this David
shouted, "Pile On!!!" and everyone jumped
Mary and beat her to a pulp.
Daily News by Nick
Mom and Mary Peterka have admitted to PIG
OUT ...then they will go on a Diet! And also
in the news, David Peterka's tape of Susan
Vega has been eaten. Hi, I'm Nick Peterka
and that's all the news for today!!!
Red Hawk Rambling by David
It all started that one day Kelly Uker up-chucked
all over Brian E. Peterka. Since that
day strange events have been occurring. One
result of that incident is that people have
been calling Ms. Uker Kelly "Puker". We also
have reason to believe that the incident Just
referred to caused Tweed Peterka to mess on
the floor at exactly 7:32 P.M. Sept. 12, 1987!
This accident really made me mad because I
had to clean it up all by myself. And that's
another thing, Brian shouldn't be going off
to his friend's house when the floor is wet.
Come to think of it a lot of things get me
upset, like all of Nick's little toys smashing
and crashing all over the place. Which
brings me to my point. Drinking and driving
will kill you.
Advice From Dear Ann
Dear Ann, I have a fatal disease and I
don't know what to do about it.
Concerned
Dear Concerned,
Thats and easy one, die.
Dear Ann, We are haveing a disagreement.
Can we use the toliet paper that was
hanging in our trees in our bathroom?
Wondering
Dear Wondering,
You know what they say - Waste not
want not.
Dear Ann, In my dreams all they ever give
me to eat is pizza. Do you think I'm
crazy?
Pizzanut
Dear Pizzanut,
Don't worry. I think you are perfectly
normal
Any problems? Write to dear Ann, XXXX
XXXXXXXX Road, XXXXXXXX, XX. XXXXX
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